Some things are necessary, despite our desire to do them. There is something right now you’re postponing, avoiding, and you know is valuable for you or your team or the company, but you’re not doing it for some reason.
Why do we wait to do what we know would help us or others? There is a pause, sometimes an uncertainty if we’re doing the right thing or doing it the right way, and sometimes a deeper reflection about how to best do a thing. The pause though is also where forgetfulness, deprioritization, distraction, novelty-seeking, and simply lack of attention get in the way.
It’s not the task’s “why” or value, it’s how we move through the pause that matters.
The answer cannot be simply extrinsically-driven; money, recognition, status. Because then it wouldn’t sustain. It also cannot be simply intrinsically-driven because one’s internal reasoning may be misaligned with external rationale.
I propose an inclusive option, that of graceful engagement. Accounting for both your inner reality and the relational context.
I’m not using “grace” from a religious sense, but more a technical sense of how easefully and smoothly an athlete moves with their environment. Grace is when that connection between inside and outside becomes visible.
Graceful engagement changes what is necessary. In that original pause, it doesn’t let you forget or ignore, but shifts how you move into the task itself. It gives you permission to acknowledge what’s necessary externally with what’s necessary internally.
A few concrete work examples:
You have an administrative task ahead of you that you’re dreading. How do you do it gracefully?
Sometimes the dread is real because the admin task is getting in the way of core work, and you need to talk to a peer, coach, mentor, lead, HRW. Sometimes you’ve made it more than it needs to be in your mind, and have to reframe.
You’re meeting with a group of people who intimidate you. How do you work with them gracefully?
Sometimes accepting discomfort may be necessary when meeting certain people. And other times, reaching out to a colleague to get another perspective may shift your thinking about the meeting.
A problem has you completely stuck, but the deadline is this week. How can you gracefully engage with it?
Sometimes a deadline extension may be necessary because the quality of the work isn’t there. And other times, shipping early may be necessary because you need more customer data.
The answer may not always be easy, but it will help you and others move through the necessary with more ease.
Next time you encounter a necessary task, ask yourself, how can I do this gracefully?
Leave a Reply